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Finding Love In A Hopeless Place…

14 Nov

So you are a single parent looking for love…. How do you approach the dating market? For one there is a lot of hesitation. You are not only looking for a mate for you but a person who is going to be accepting of your child. If dating wasn’t hard enough, now you have to find a person who will love and treat your child with respect. First things first do your home work. As the old saying states “everything that glitters isn’t gold”.  I have worked in the area of Social Services for years in particular child abuse and child neglect. The majority of children who are abused are by either a step-parent, girlfriend or boyfriend. This is not to say that parent’s don’t abuse their own children it is just a higher rate with third-party adults.  It is important to do your history and not ignore the signs. I know this is a sensitive topic for many but it is a REAL topic that needs to be exposed.

Second be upfront… A lot of people hide the fact they have a child until they feel comfortable. I say keep it apart of conversation. You don’t have to introduce your child to your potential mate until you feel comfortable but it should be apart of conversation.   Let that individual know you have a child and what your expectations of he or she will be. That way you will know where the relationship is going rather than the blind leading the blind. It makes no sense investing time and energy if someone can not accept your child and the responsibilities that come a long with it.

Third is prepare your child for the potential of this new person in your life. Contrary to belief children have feelings too. When you are absolutely sure about your mate and know he or she is the one. Depending on your child’s age and developmental level you should begin discussions about your feelings about this person. Let your child know where this person stands in your life and discuss your childs feelings about this new person in your life. Often children feel neglected and disowned… This is the time to express to your child what they really mean in your life.

People become single parents for many reasons often not by choice however you can find love… Even in the most unlikely of places… Take your time, do your research, communicate and always remember to pray!!!

* I would like to hear from all my single parents about their experiences with dating… Please weigh in loves…

Ciao,

Simply Studded

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